


i love you

by ashleberry



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Cuddling & Snuggling, Eventual Fluff, Eventual Romance, Feelings, Flirting, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending, LGBTQ Themes, Light-Hearted, Love, M/M, One Shot, Relationship(s), Romance, Slow Burn, Tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-01
Updated: 2019-07-01
Packaged: 2020-05-30 17:05:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19407622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashleberry/pseuds/ashleberry
Summary: Based off the song, "i love you" by Billie Eilish, this short story is about a boy named Dan who is best friends with a boy named Phil. Their relationship is complicated, and even though Dan does truly love Phil, he's not so sure that he wants to.





	i love you

**Author's Note:**

> i highly suggest listening to "i love you" by billie eilish before reading! this is based off that song :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thx to rhea and alex for helping me revise!
> 
> twitters  
> rhea: @cloudy_djh  
> alex: @pridefulpml

"I love you, Dan," Phil whispered with Dan in his arms as a single tear rolled down Phil's cheek. 

_baby, won't you take it back? say you were trying to make me laugh, and nothing has to change today? you didn't mean to say “i love you”_

**~**

dan howell had never been the type to let someone see right through him. when phil lester had been introduced into his life, however, dan did exactly that. they had met through the magic of the internet 10 years earlier and had been literal soulmates ever since. not in a romantic way though, definitely not.

they had both realized that everyone thinks they are more than friends, but they have been denying it since they met. not only to everyone around them, but also to themselves. it was especially a sensitive topic for dan, as deep down he knew he loved phil in a romantic way. though he wasn’t quite comfortable enough with who he was to admit that to himself, let alone anyone else.

dan treasured those moments where he and phil would share extended eye contact or sit closer than they needed to, but at the same time those moments made him feel so much fear. he couldn’t have a romantic relationship with phil. everything was too perfect the way it was to change anything.

**_~_ **

**november 14, 2019**

**3:23 am**

as unhealthy as it is, it was normal for dan to be awake at this time, either browsing the internet or editing a video. on this particular night, he was scrolling through his twitter timeline when he heard a familiar sound coming from his bedside table.

**New message from “philly”**

it was unusual for Phil to be up at this time of night. dan had a worried expression on his face as he unlocked his phone and checked the text, hoping everything was alright.

**phil:** hihhihiihi are you awake

 **dan:** duh. why tf are you awake

 **p:** i cant sleep :( wyd

 **d:** on twitter. you

 **p:** texting you

 **d:** you are so annoying

… _two minutes later_

 **p:** im borrreeeedddd can i come to your room

 **d:** ofc

barely five seconds after dan sent that text, he heard his bedroom door opening. “Hi” phil said through a giggle.

“Hi, you dork.”

“Mind if I turn the light on?” phil asked after he switched the light on.

“No, but what’s the point in asking if you already turned it on?” dan mocked as he moved his laptop from his lap and sat up in his bed.

“You’re mean,” phil whined but fought back a smile, then his almost-smile softened and he moved to join dan on his bed. “but I love you anyways”.

_baby won’t you take it back?_

dan looked down at his hands and didn’t look up or say anything for what felt like an hour. in reality it wasn’t even a minute. thankfully phil broke the silence by blurting “I’m thirsty. Want a ribena or something?”

dan scoffed then answered “Yeah, sure, ribena’s good.”

“Coming right up!”

dan let out a soft chuckle and shook his head after phil left his bedroom.

in less than 2 minutes phil was back with 2 bottles of ribena and a bag of marshmallows. “Look what I brought!” phil said with a grin.

after nearly half an hour of random banter and eating marshmallows, dan finally started to feel sleepy. he let out a yawn then laid his head down on his pillow, head turned to face Phil. “You can go to sleep, I don’t mind.” phil mentioned gently.

“Yeah, I think I will. Goodnight, Phil.” dan said quietly through another yawn. phil didn’t get up to leave, though. dan opened one eye and saw phil still looking at him. “What?”

“Um, would it bother you if…” dan looked at him with a questioning stare. “Would you mind if I,” phil took a breath before continuing, “would you mind if I slept in here with you tonight?”

“Oh, I, uh-” 

“Never mind. It was a dumb idea anyways.” phil stood up and started to walk out. “I’ll just go back to my room, goodn-”

“No, Phil!” phil turned back to dan. “I’m sorry. It was rude of me to even think about it. Of course you can sleep in here”.

“Oh, thanks” phil said bashfully with a small smile as he slipped back in to dan’s bed. even though phil was faced away from dan, dan still felt the comfort and warmth of him being there with him. it felt so right, so perfect. dan couldn’t dare to change that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> more chapters soon uwu
> 
> follow me on twitter @goldstarsdjh


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